Transcription:
Self Care for Caregivers

Bill Klaproth: These are very stressful times, especially for our caregivers. So how can they find time for themselves and practice self-care during COVID-19? Let's find out with Kora Schmid, palliative care supervisor, and spiritual care advisor at MarinHealth. 

This is the Healing Podcast from MarinHealth, I'm Bill Klaproth. Kora, always so great to talk with you. So let's talk about caregivers in the stress that they're under. What symptoms of stress do caregivers usually experience? 

Kora Schmid: First, let me say thank you for welcoming me back.   Let me explain it first that caregiver's stress is actually a syndrome. The condition is characterized by physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion.

Host: So it affects everything physically, mentally, and emotionally. 

Kora: So on the physical level, for example, it affects our respiratory system. And that means that we may just experience very shallow breathing or holding our breath. And so our cells don't take in enough oxygen which can lead to dizziness. That feeling of the lack of concentration and some people actually faint. Or in our circulatory system, when we are under stress, our heart starts to beat much faster and the blood gets pumped around the body faster than usual. And so our blood pressure may rise when we're under stress. And that in itself can cause other symptoms, maybe as a heart attack or stroke. And also our digestive system, we may experience diarrhea or constipation or heartburn or acid reflux and so it takes a toll and you may feel overwhelmed, or we notice that we're constantly worrying. We don't get enough sleep or too much sleep or that our emotion has the tendency to  sadness. And also, what is a sign that there is stress is when we start to let go of activities that we usually enjoy doing. And of course, then addiction, when we turn to smoking or drugs or eating to relieve some of the stress that we may experience. 

Host: Well, that puts it into easy to understand terms on how stress can impact us physically. You also talked about the mental stress of worrying and the emotional stress of sadness. And I imagine right now, during COVID-19, this really makes everything worse. 

Kora: Oh, absolutely. You know, it just notches it up 10 times because there is no time for us to really relax, and get into the comfort of safety and security and stability, we are on a constant roller coaster. 

Host: It's very, very stressful for all of us. And what about the health care workers, the COVID-19 pandemic has got to have impacted their stress levels, immensely? 

Kora: Yes, these are the people that are on the front lines. We see it on TV and you know, I see it here at our hospital. We are here. We are coming every single day to work. And to help alleviate the suffering, and of course, there's always the fear and the risk that we may as the healthcare providers, contract the virus as well. 

Host: So looking at this family and independent caregivers can experience the same issues and symptoms of stress that our healthcare workers experience is that right? 

Kora: Absolutely. You know, I would actually use the word caregiver burnout. And what we would see there when we are creeping up towards the burnout is that you don't feel that you're as energetic as before. You are also more prone to catch the flu or the virus if your immune system is down. And then perhaps your sleep is affected by it. Maybe you don't sleep because you are worried and exhausted. 

Host: So these are trying and stressful times for our caregivers, along with our health care workers. So Cora, what advice can you give caregivers in the community that will help them manage these issues that you just talked about? 

Kora: I think first and most of all, we all have to come to the understanding that self-care is of great importance. For example, do I have enough rest? Do I have time to relax? Because that all will benefit overall health and wellbeing and also promote stronger and healthy relationships. Cause if I'm stressed, I don't have much to give to somebody else. And so the relationship may be strained. So really taking care of self and by doing so, what we need to look at first, or most of all is that we are healthy that means, eat well, do your exercise. And it also means that in spite of the pandemic we are continuing with our health screen checks. Go and get your shots, do your annual, do all of that, cause it's possible, you know, with telemedicine and the clinics are open that people who can be seen. So then we are staying on top of our own health, which is really, really, really important. And then also what has become very popular these days is to create a quarantine pandemic pod. Have you heard about this Bill?

Host: I have not, a pandemic pod? 

Kora: So, we are social creatures and, with the pandemic, there is a lot of isolation. And over the month now, they came up with what they call the pandemic pod, that you choose up to 12 people that you feel comfortable with, to socialize so that you have social interaction with individuals that have quarantined that have the same values, that means they wear their mask, they do all the precautions that you feel safe in their vicinity.

Host: Okay. 

Kora: And then also, take mini respites. So take breaks. And you can do that by going for a walk, just a few minutes down the street, just take a walk around the block or go to a park, or, just simply take time for yourself. And exercise, that really helps a lot. And, 30 minutes a day really is enough. And if you cannot do 30 minutes, take 10 minutes increments, over the day, go out for a walk or go jogging, do yoga, whatever it is that just gets this body moving.

Host: Yes. Really important. So you said self-care is of utmost importance and that means staying healthy. So make sure you're eating well. Exercising, as you were just mentioning. Make sure you're getting your regular health screen checks. You mentioned the pandemic pod, that could be something to look into, choose up to 12 people to socialize with, and then take those mini-breaks. Go for a walk. Just pay attention to yourself and your self-care. Cora, let me ask you this. If there was one main recommendation you have for someone, if you said if there's one thing you'd do, what is that?

Kora: Get a good night's sleep.

Host: Hmm. Okay, no hesitation there.

Kora: Nope, because that is what we neglect. 

Host: That's It's so true, and when you're sleep-deprived, your immune deprived, if you will, that's not a medical term, but you can compromise your immune system when you're tired. When you don't sleep properly. And that's one of the things you don't want to have in COVID-19 is a compromised immune system.

Kora: No, it's also scientifically proven that with chronic sleep loss, it's like you're driving under the influence. So, getting a good night rest, letting the brain go into the sleep mode. Which will help the brain actually to release and flush out the toxins that it has accumulated over our waking state. Creates a normal functioning of the entire body. The brain needs to rest. And so that would be the main recommendation.

Host: Wow. That's really powerful. make sure you pay attention to sleep. How does somebody find enough time in the day to do those self-care tips that you gave us before and, or even have the time to sleep an extra hour or an extra half hour, how do we find time in the day to take care of ourselves?

Kora: I think rule number one. We all have to learn to say no. So, if there is a choice that you could say, well, maybe I would love to help you to babysit your kids or run an errand. Perhaps it would be better to say I would, but at the moment I can't. So you set really good boundaries especially during these times, we all want to help, we all want to be there for others. But we first have to be there for oneself. And then on the same note by saying no, but also not forgetting the yes. When somebody actually offers to help you, whatever it is, if the neighbor says, oh I'll take your kids to the park with mask and social distancing all in place, I'll do that for you. Or I go shopping, do you have a shopping list? And to say, yes, and within that context of Yes and no, what we really have to let go is micromanaging. So to allow others to be there and not having also the need that we need to control everything.

Host: Wow, that's really, really powerful. And as you were saying that I'm thinking when you say no to other things, you're saying yes to yourself. Which is important and then say yes to help if somebody offers to do something for you. Let go of the micromanaging, let them do it. If the neighbor has the mower out and is like, hey, my mowers out, you want me to just quick do the yard for you? Yes, please.

Kora: Absolutely. 

Host: That would be great. And then I'm imagining when you take better care of yourself when you say yes to yourself when you practice self-care, that probably makes you a better caregiver then too. You're able to take better care of other people, is that right?

Kora: Absolutely. Because you are refilling your glass. You're not running on empty by saying no, by really taking care of yourself you have the energy to show up. And, take good care of others as well, and be a role model, so that others may learn oh, you can do this or you look, well, what do you do? So there's always the chance to be a mentor.

Host: Right. Kind of leading by example.

Kora: Exactly. Yes. 

Host: Well, your tips have been fantastic. Kora, can you share any final thoughts when it comes to helping our caregivers manage stress? 

Kora: Yes, the first thing is try to look for the silver lining. Think about all the many ways that you can actually become stronger and resilient and in charge and in control of a situation or have a choice. Instead of saying, Oh, I have no control and it's beyond me. But going for the positive way of solution-finding. And then the other piece, number two, get your own validation, because in the times like this, you know, everyone is so busy trying to stay on top of stress and condemning and so forth. Sometimes the acknowledgment of what we are doing is not as forthcoming as it could be. It's just, it fell to the wayside. So acknowledge yourself for the difference that you make in somebody else's life and in your own life.

Host: That's so good. Can you say it one more time Kora? 

Kora: Acknowledge to yourself what difference you make in someone else's life and in your own.

Host: That's really hard for a lot of people. I think.

Kora: Right. And if you get there, find something that you can reward yourself with. Whether that's a good cup of coffee. Whether that's buying yourself flowers or something. Just the validation of no, what I am doing is good and I'm making a difference. It helps to build resilience.

Host: Acknowledge to yourself what difference you make in someone else's life and your own. You know, we never really think about how I'm there for my children or I'm there for my spouse or I'm there for my mom or my dad. And it's true, you are, you are a needed individual and people need you, and they love you for that. But we never take the time to recognize that in ourselves, is that right Kora?

Kora: That's correct? Yes, absolutely. 

Host: So when should we do that? When we're feeling stressed or overwhelmed? 

Kora: Yes, but you know, if you could do it just as a daily practice so you build a foundation of acknowledgment and gratitude. Just doing this will make a huge difference in your day.

Host: So you're filling that bucket up that reservoir of goodwill towards yourself. Which will help you alleviate stress? 

Kora: That's correct.

Host: Kora, you're the best. Thank you. I always love talking with you. Thank you so much for your time and your wisdom not only for caregivers and healthcare workers, for anyone listening to this podcast, there are just great takeaways. So, thank you again for your thoughtful words and great advice for all of us.

Kora: Thank you, Bill, for having me, I'm looking forward to talking again.

Host: That's Kora Schmid and to learn more, please visit MyMarinHealth.org. And if you found this podcast helpful, please share it on your social channels and check out the full podcast library for topics of interest to you. This is the Healing Podcast brought to you by MarinHealth. I'm Bill Klaproth, thanks for listening.That's Kora Schmid and to learn more, please visit MyMarinHealth.org. And if you found this podcast helpful, please share it on your social channels and check out the full podcast library for topics of interest to you. This is the Healing Podcast brought to you by MarinHealth. I'm Bill Klaproth, thanks for listening.