Transcription:
Overwhelmed: How to Work, Love & Play When No One Has the Time

Intro: The following SHSMD Podcast is a production of DoctorPodcasting.com.

Bill Klaproth: On this edition of the SHSMD Podcast, let me ask you this: Are you addicted to work? Has your work-life balance scale tipped over and crumbled to the floor? Are you the mayor of busy town? Well, if you answered yes to any of those, make sure you listen to this podcast is we're going to talk with Brigid Shulte about her session at this year's SHSMD Connections 2022. It's titled Overwhelmed: How to Work, Love, and Play When No One Has The Time. Are you interested in that? Yeah, you're interested in that. Come on now, who are we kidding? You're into that. I am too. So there, we're both into that. So let's talk to Brigid right now.

This is the SHSMD Podcast Rapid Insights for healthcare strategy professionals and planning, business development, marketing, communications, and public relations. I'm your host, Bill Klaproth. In this episode, we talk with Brigid Shulte, Director, Better Life Lab at New America. She is also a writer and a podcast host. And Bridgid is presenting at this year's SHSMD Connections in-person annual conference September 11th through the 14th in Washington, DC. Are you going? What do you mean no? Get signed up. Come on now. Her session is titled Overwhelmed: How to Work, Love, and Play When No One Has The Time.

Bridgid, welcome to the SHSMD Podcast. As you know, we start every episode of the SHSMD Podcast with rapid insights, one quick tip someone can use to make their marketing communications better today. Bridgid, give us your rapid insight.

Brigid Schulte: What I can talk about is really about when you're feeling really stressed and overwhelmed and you feel like there's just way too much going on and you don't know where to start, my tip is get out of the tunnel. So what happens when we're feeling overwhelmed is, literally, our brain goes into kind of a tunneling mode. And our IQ drops, we're not able to kind of see very far ahead. We kind of do the quick things that are right in front of. And that can just lead to more and more and more overwhelm. You feel like you got to dig out of your email inbox rather than look at the big picture. So the tip is stop, pause, take a deep breath, get out of the tunnel. Take your time to figure out what's really important and put your attention there.

Bill Klaproth (host): That is a great rapid insight. So get out of the tunnel, stop, pause, and breathe. So those are some easy tips if you're feeling overwhelmed, right?

Brigid Schulte: Yeah. That helps you see not only to stop, but then really get clear. It's all about intention. Get really clear on what's most important to you at that moment. And that's where you direct your attention.

Bill Klaproth: Absolutely. Well, that's what we want to talk to you about today. Your upcoming session at SHSMD Connections 2022. Overwhelmed: How to Work, Love, and Play When No One Has The Time. So on the description of the session, Bridgid, it says, today, many of us are caught up in a swirl of overwhelm. For example, Americans work among the longest hours of any advanced economy.

We value busy-ness as a badge of honor. How true is that? So the question is, is all of that time and attention we're pouring into our jobs really ensuring the best and most innovative work? These are great questions, much less a healthy and full life. So that overwork culture is leading to burnout, stress, sickness, disengagement. So Bridgid, why do we value this busyness. I love that word, busyness, instead of business. Why do we choose to live in this swirl of overwhelm?

Brigid Schulte: You know, it's really interesting in the research that I've been doing, as some researchers call it a non-choice choice. We live in a society where productivity is valued. We get our sense of identity often from work, from how much we earn, so that so much of what we consider valuable and important is in that first kind of great sphere of life, work, and not in love and not in play. And so then, we tie our value to how much we can get done and how productive we can be and how busy we are. It's sort of always had this underpinning of, you know, the Protestant work ethic and idle hands or the devil's workshop. That's been a very strong strain throughout American history, but it's really ratcheted up in recent years.

And it's not just technology, you know, a lot of people think that it was because once we started carrying iPhones in our back pockets, things got nuts. But it's really not true when you look at work hours, they really started ratcheting up in the 1980s. So this is a fairly new phenomenon. It predated technology and technology is just speeding things up even more. And so some people think about it as almost a price of admission that you have to be busy to show that you're valuable and worthy. And part of what my book is about, my research is about, my ongoing work is to really show that that's just not true and we're actually shooting ourselves in the foot if we continue on these kind of like endless wheels of busyness, going kind of running faster and faster and going nowhere.

Bill Klaproth (host): Yeah, that's so true. So I like how you called it a non-choice choice, right? It's almost like table stakes. "I've got to show that I'm a hard worker. I've got to get in there. I've got to grind every day. I've got to grind. And we do kind of wear that as a badge of honor. "Hey, look. I'm working 11-hour days and I'm hardly getting any sleep," right? That's kind of the "Look at me. I'm doing it like everybody else. And I can work harder than everyone." So, nose to the grindstone. Got to keep going. So that's obviously many of our attitudes here in America.

in the description. I mentioned, this nose to the grindstone, work, work, work, the gerbil wheel, as you said, can lead to burnout, stress, sickness, disengagement. Can you talk about that a little bit more? What this overwhelm is doing to us physically and emotionally and why it is so bad for us?

Brigid Schulte: Some of the most powerful research that's out there is in occupational safety and health, and there was one meta-analysis done not long ago of more than 200 studies, really trying to understand what work stress does to our bodies and our lives and our live expectancy. And what they found, there were these 10 stressful factors. They called them psychosocial stressors, you know, and this is not falling off a ladder or going down into a coal mine. This is having a toxic boss. This is working long hours. This is feeling that, you're working really hard, but you're not getting rewarded for it or recognized for it, sort of there's this sense of low sense of justice.

So these 10 psychosocial factors lead to either acute heart attack, sort of an acute stressful event. Or they build up over time where you get tired and burned out. And so then maybe you come home from work and you're too tired to go to the gym and you'll search for comfort food. And so then over time, it leads to obesity or diabetes. So these work stressors, you know, they can work in the moment or work over time. But what they've found is that it creates so much ill health, chronic ill health, that work itself is the fifth leading cause of death in the United States. You know, it's about as dangerous as secondhand smoke, which is a known and regulated carcinogen. And we don't pay any attention to that at all. And it's interesting for this new book that I'm working on, I've been spending time with workaholics, trying to understand some of that kind of internal compulsion. And so what so many of them say is that it's so hard to have an addiction that is so rewarded in our society, because when you think about it, just like you were saying, you think about in the pandemic, it not just that you're there physically, because in so many places you couldn't be, but it's become virtual presence. "Look at me. I'm emailing at 11 o'clock at night. Look at me. I'm answering something, you know, on a Google spreadsheet at two in the morning. I'm amazing." So we have these notions that kind of always on either virtual presence or in the office is what makes you, what researchers call, the ideal worker. There's reams of research now, that's made it so clear that's not how you are an ideal worker at all.

Bill Klaproth: So, this is really tough to break out of because workaholics are rewarded in our society. Is that right?

Brigid Schulte: When you live in a society where business and workaholism is really prized and valued, it's really hard to break away from that on your own. I know we'll be talking about tips and strategies later, and what I look at is change on the societal level, change on the organizational and team levels, and then also at the individual level. And at the individual level, it's so important when you want to break away from that, break some of these cycles of busyness or workaholism to find likeminded peers, a supportive network, because it's really difficult to push back against the status quo just on your own.

Bill Klaproth: So with workaholism, what seems like rooted in our culture, "I've got to show that i'm answering emails at 11:00 pm so the boss thinks i'm great and I'm all in all the time." With that type of attitude baked into our culture, how do we change that? How do we break out of this

Brigid Schulte: There are a couple really important keys and you mentioned one of them, the boss. "Ooh, the boss is going to think that I'm really great if I do this," This Is where leadership is really critical. When I've studied sort of change and change in organizations, change can come a lot of different ways. It can burble up from the bottom. It can come in from the sides, in the middle. But honestly, the most effective cultural change really comes from the top when there's leader buy-in. And so that's a lot of why a lot of the research that I do is sort of aimed at that level of manager and boss and leader, to try to help them see that the way that, you know, creating burnout cultures is not just bad for the people that work for them, not just bad for employees, but it's actually also bad for innovation. It's bad for productivity. There's research that shows that you can push people work longer hours for maybe a few weeks. But after maybe two or three weeks of 60-hour work weeks, you get to the same productivity as if you just continued working that 40-hour work week.

And now, there's new movements of having a four-day work week. And they're finding there's great productivity, because you've built in rest and you've built in time to sort of get out of that busyness tunnel, so that you can be really intentional about thinking, "Well, what is my work? What is the most valuable thing that I can do today? What is my business proposition?" And then, you spend your time focusing on that. There's so much work that we fill those hours with a lot of garbage, a lot of running around, a lot of going to meetings that don't really mean anything and you don't have an agenda and then you don't really know what you're supposed to do afterwards. And then, you kind of chit chat afterwards and that's where you get the real stuff done. And you know, there's a lot of performance of work. And then there's just a lot of garbage of work that goes on.

And so one of the things that I really try to impart to business leaders is getting really clear, getting really intentional on what the work is and organizing the day, the time around that and rewarding performance, rewarding the output rather than the input. For so long, we've managed for input as if we're all factory workers, it's like, "Oh, you're sitting there. Therefore, you must be doing a good job." And that always disadvantaged people who worked more flexibly or digitally, you know, which for quite some time was women or mothers or caregivers. And so I think the research now is so clear and, through the pandemic, it's so clear. So many people said they were more. when they could be really focused on what was most important. Get that important work done first, you know, and you kind of cut through a lot of the garbage of work. So that's important, getting clear on what the work is, having really strong leadership. But this is also where peer networks come in as well. Workers themselves can be very clear about what their priorities are and communicate those, try to make the change kind of from the bottom or the middle up as well. There are ways to change.

Bill Klaproth (host): I like that term you used, performance of work. That's a really interesting phrase. So you said it starts at the top and our leadership has to change. If you work for someone who doesn't buy into this or is of the old work, work work, "What are you doing today?" How do you deal with that then if you work for a boss that believes in this old outdated work culture, if you will? What do you do then?

Brigid Schulte: Well, I got to tell you, all you have to do is look at the quit rates. We're already seeing what's happening. We're already seeing people voting with their feet and they're leaving. So if you're a leader, if you're a boss and we're already in an era where a lot of people are saying that they're short of workers, they can't find people that they need, they can't find the talent, this is something to keep in mind. Survey after survey has made really clear that things have flipped. People don't want to work that old, always in the office kind of mode, that they really want to create more space and time for their life, that they want to do good work. It's not about, I think, for the longest time working differently somehow in the minds of bosses meant working less, like, "Oh, I need to see you in order to make sure you're really productive." And I think the lie to that is I've been in places where bosses can say, "Oh, all these people are here late, because they're the best workers." And then, you look around and half of them are playing solitaire. They just need to be physically there because that's what the boss values. So, when you can switch that and really make the conversation about the work that you do and what you produce and the quality of that, that's when things can really begin to change.

Bill Klaproth (host): So are there things we can do during the day to try to alleviate this stress? Or what other type of change can we do on our own, regardless of who we work for? And like you say, people are leaving the workforce and that old saying, "You don't leave companies, you leave bad bosses." But say, I like where I work, I like what I do, the person I work for, isn't the greatest, but okay, what can I do on my own so I can manage this better, so I'm not so overwhelmed, so I'm not dealing with this acute stress. What are some strategies for the individual?

Brigid Schulte: Well, I think one of the first and probably the most important things for most people is to recognize that it's not their fault. There's so much self-blame that goes on when people feel overwhelmed, they feel like, "Oh, it's all my fault. If only I did this better. If only I did that better." And so I think the first thing is to be aware, just have that awareness of the kind of culture that you're in, whether it's in your organization to try to have a better understanding of these external pressures to be the ideal worker, to be the ideal mother or the ideal parent. We have these very powerful cultural norms that if we're not aware of them, you know, it's like we're dancing to this tune we don't even hear. So that's really important to have that sense of awareness, begin to detach from it. This is where probably the most important thing you can do, going back to that first rapid tip is just pause, just stop, even when you think you don't have time. That's probably the most important time to stop. And I have to remind myself of this all the time, believe me. You know, I'm trying to practice what I preach and I get overwhelmed and I kind of fall and come back to try to get back into balance, but recognize, really taking a time to pause, to breathe. And like you say, if you like your work, if you like your job, getting clear on, well, what is most important? What do I really need to do? What is the one thing I need to do today? And then, creating space and time in your calendar to make that happen.

I mean, one of the most interesting things, like when I've worked with behavioral scientists and we've worked on overwork cultures and tried to understand what drives them and how we can change them. And what's really so interesting is that just about in any place that we've gone, people would say, "Oh, I'm so busy all day long, I'm running, running, running, running. And then I get to the end of the day and I haven't done that one thing I really needed to do," so they stay late or they take work home or they take it in the weekends. And then, you get more and more tired and angry and resentful. And so if you just stopped at 10 in the morning and thought about, "Well, what's my priority?" Or if you planned your week and said, "These are the two or three things I really need to do," put it on your calendar, "This is the time that I'm going to do it." so many people don't do that. You've got to intentionally schedule. How is the work gonna get done? If you don't have it on your schedule, then you'll get scheduled over and you get pulled into a meeting and then you'll go to answer your emails and then you get panicked and, you know, you get in that kind of gerbil wheel.

So one of my favorite sort of tips, if you will, comes from a behavioral economist and he said, you know, we think about our schedules, that because we have this busyness mindset, that if we just cram it with a bunch of stuff, like it's a crammed pantry, just bursting at the seams and the doors are about to pop open, that somehow that's good. And he said, what we really need to be thinking about more is our schedules. There's our time. More like an art gallery, where you're really intentional about what you pick and you place it very carefully. And then, there's white space so that, you know, there's something else to go to next, but you have time to recover and process and understand before you tie up loose ends before you go to the next thing. That's something that I've really tried to embrace in my own life, is thinking about my calendar like an art gallery.

Bill Klaproth (host): That is a great tip, Bridgid. I really like that. So some of the things you were mentioning, make sure you become self-aware, stop the self-blame. Be aware if you're trying to fit into the cultural norms of I'm a good person or I'm great if I work hard. And you said, if things do get overwhelming, stop, breathe. And then, be clear on what is most important. And I like that thought about if there's one or two things you have to get done that day, make sure you get it done, because I'm thinking if you don't get it done that day, then they go to the next day. But there's a couple other things you have to get done. If you don't get those done, then it's the next day. And then, you've got this to-do list that is just so hard to overcome at that point that all this acute stress starts building up because, "How do I ever get through this to-do list? I've got eight major things to get done and then with all the other stuff that pops up during the day, ah!" People are pulling their hair out.

Brigid Schulte: Yeah, the other thing to think about is, this is a David Allen tip that I live by, because I used to have a to-do list that went like miles long and then I never could get to the end of it. And I always felt so guilty and I always felt so overwhelmed. You create that reality for yourself. one of the things that David Allen writes about is, "Okay, so think about your to-do list in a completely different way. Think about it like a brain dump." So you're getting it all out of your head so that it doesn't live in your head, because if you don't write it down, you're constantly expending energy trying to remember stuff. So write it down, so then you pick one or two things from your dump, but you don't do the entire dump. That's helped me a lot. Sometimes I'll set up my to-do list for the week, it's like, "Here are the things that I really want to do. Here are the things that I want the universe to do for me." You know, here's all the other stuff that I'm not going to get to not today, not this week probably, but I want to keep them in mind, so they're sort of in my dump. And what's nice is over time, some of the things, they do resolve themselves, so you can stay focused on fewer, better things.

Bill Klaproth (host): Which is good. And I like how you say schedule the time in for those really important tasks. Schedule it in and that'll help you stay on track and avoid the overload of the crazy to-do list. That makes a lot of sense. So tell us more about your session. We're kind of talking a little bit about what you're going to touch on, but you're going to go more in depth on all of these things. Tell us more about your session and what we should expect.

Brigid Schulte: So I talk about work, love and play. I do a lot about work-life. I do a lot about, gender equality. But really at the heart of all of the research and writing I do is how do we live a good life? What is the good life? And I start with Eric Erikson who is, you know, a famous Harvard psychologist. And he said the richest and fullest lives make time for what he called the three great arenas of life: work, love and play. And so in my talk, I talk about how it's important to have time in each of these spheres, how to kind of redefine ourselves and what we value and who we are, so it's not all just in that work sphere.

So what I do is I talk about some of the myths and the pressures, those cultural norms that drive us to help create that awareness. And then, I use a lot of story and research to poke holes at some of those myths. And to try to give listeners a new understanding, a new vision of what really could work and how we really could have time for good, meaningful, purposeful work, time for love and connection and care and time to play. Because in a productivity-obsessed, busyness society, play goes out the window and we think it's stupid and leisure's a waste of time. And so even when I was researching my book, I was worried that, "Oh, it's not serious. People are going to think I'm an idiot that I'm writing about this." And I really have newfound respect for play and leisure. And so I bring in a lot of the research about why it's not only important for our mental health, our physical health, but also for our souls, sense of self and our quality of life.

Bill Klaproth (host): So thinking about those three, work, love, play, like you were talking about. Schedule those most important activities on your daily calendar. It sounds like we should do that with all three of those, because the work sphere, I feel like probably takes up most of the time and the energy available during the week, leaving love and play, like I said, short trip. They don't get the attention they need, which leads to that unbalanced, overwhelmed, stressed out life. Is that right?

Brigid Schulte: Yeah. You've hit it on the head. It's interesting one of the things that I talk about is there's been a lot of happiness research in the recent years. And it really all boils down to kind of common sense, what we always knew all along is that human happiness is based in our connection with other people. I think that's one of the reasons why the pandemic has been so hard. We've been so isolated and we've been isolated from loved ones. We haven't been able to get together with friends. You know, people are just sort of coming out and blinking from the darkness of their isolated caves. So it's really important that you make time for that. So that's a lot of what I talk about as well is, at the end of your life, you know, we are here for a limited time only. Time is a very precious and limited resource. Nobody ever wished they'd spent more time at the office, and so how to bring that sensibility into your day, as you start your day,

Bill Klaproth (host): So true. So true. So final thoughts, Bridgid, and thank you so much for your time. Any thoughts you want to add when it comes to being overwhelmed, how to work, love and play when no one has the time? Final thoughts?

Brigid Schulte: Well, I think one thing that I would really like to leave people with is we talk a lot about time management. I think one of the smartest things I ever heard is you can't manage time, but what you can manage are your own expectations and your priorities. So it really is like one of the biggest journeys you can make when you think about time is in your own mind and your mindset, and you do have power over that.

Bill Klaproth (host): Oh, that's pretty powerful. You can't manage time, but you can manage your own expectations of it?

Brigid Schulte: The expectations and priorities of what you're going to do in time.

Bill Klaproth (host): With that time that you have. Wow, pretty powerful. This is going to be a great session. And hopefully, people come out of that with great strategies and tips on how to adjust that work, love, play, balance, and get them all in line. Bridgid, thank you so much for your time. We appreciate it.

Brigid Schulte: Oh, it's great to talk with you.

Bill Klaproth: And once again, that's Bridgid Schulte. And registration for this year's SHSMD Connections in-person annual conference held in Washington, DC is now open. Visit SHSMD, that's S-H-S-M-D.org/connections, to learn more and to get yourself registered. I hope you come to this. It's going to be a great conference. And you're going to walk away meeting a lot of great people and you're going to walk away with a lot of education, resources, and materials to make yourself better at your day-to-day job. And if you found this podcast helpful, and of course, how could you not? Please share it on all of your social channels and make sure you hit the subscribe or follow button to get every episode. This has been a production of DoctorPodcasting. I'm Bill Klaproth. So ya!