Venita Currie (Host): As the holiday season approaches, stress and anxiety can often overshadow the joy of the season. Our guest today is Ashley Soulard, Primary Care Provider at St. Joseph's Hospital Family Medicine and Specialty Services in Milford, New Hampshire. You definitely want to hear her insights on how to manage holiday stress to maintain your peace and balance through the practices of meditation, and mindfulness. Welcome to Wellness First, a St. Joseph Hospital podcast where we hear and learn directly from the experts on all things health and wellness. I'm your host, Venita Curry. Ashley, welcome to the show.

Ashley Soulard, APRN: Hi, Venita. Good afternoon. Thanks for having me.

Host: Sure. Well, we just got through Thanksgiving, Ashley, and I think a lot of our viewers will agree that the holiday season can be marvelously stressful. What are some of the common reasons why people feel stressed out?

Ashley Soulard, APRN: I would say, you know, seeing patients recently before the holidays, even just after the holidays, we're still just getting into them. It has a lot to do with money, time, planning, big, big planning, and of course, keeping up with normal routines and self-care throughout the holidays.

Host: So what are some of the warning signs that we should be looking for? Because there's a stress that is just living, but then there's unimaginable stress where people actually need to reach out get some help. What are some of those warning signs that we should look for?

Ashley Soulard, APRN: Yeah, I would say, you know, it's also just good to know that it is normal to reach out and ask for help. It happens more often than not. Sometimes people come in for an acute cough, end up really connecting with a provider and expressing these concerns that they also do have, and that is normal. You know, just realizing that your day to day activities aren't happening fluently like they used to, starting to become more isolated, pushing off your normal gym routine or, watching movies with the kids at night because you just feel too stressed to look at anything that has to do with the holidays.

So really to do with falling off of your normal routine and isolation is definitely things to look out for. And again, just talk with somebody about it.

Host: Yeah, I also think it's important for people to understand how beneficial it is to do some self-care in those moments. Can you give us the science behind how mindfulness and meditation is beneficial to help us become less stressed?

Ashley Soulard, APRN: Yeah, you know, it's not often looked at, but there are studies that do show that mindfulness, meditation, I'm sure people have seen it over and over again, that 10 minutes a day, 10 minutes a day. And to us, you may think there's no way that that's going to work for me. But really taking that 10 minutes, you know, to yourself, whether it's first thing in the morning, you know, before going to get your cup of coffee, it could be on a drive to work, you know, in the afternoon before you pick up the kids or in the carpool line, that 10 minutes, really of just collecting your mindfulness and deep breathing can make a difference, but it takes practice just like anything else.

So, you know, you get into a routine, you start doing these things. I can go over a couple of techniques, throughout the process here, but really routine and being consistent with these things, can help throughout the holidays.

Host: Yes. Tell us what are some of those techniques?

Ashley Soulard, APRN: Some things that they have found in studies, some of them I practice on my own or have told patients to do, that they find helpful, believe it or not, again, just 10 minutes a day, there's apps, deep breathing apps, some people have them on, you know, Apple Watches, that can take you through the process, really just again, counting.

They find counting is another relaxing technique. So, ten deep breaths, all the way in, all the way out. Breathing in for the full five seconds, exhaling the full five seconds. Doing that 10 times or throughout your favorite song can help. Again, just driving to work or in the car, that's something that we all have time for.

 Another one would be the 3-3-3 rule is something that recent studies have shown on, three things to bring you to mindfulness that we see in the moment, three things that we hear in the moment, and then really just connecting, becoming more grounded with three things that you feel.

So just noticing, like, my hands are on the steering wheel, my feet are on the floor, my bottom is in the seat of my car chair. So, just collectively coming back to the present can help you recognize what you're really into in the moment, realizing that you're not in physical danger, those types of things.

So really just bringing yourself back to the present moment can help decrease anxiety, and then in turn, keep the rest of your day fluent.

Host: So, I was going to ask you to explain what mindfulness is. Is that mindfulness is just bringing yourself back to being present in the moment? Is that what that means?

Ashley Soulard, APRN: Really, in like an overall capture of mindfulness, it really is just bringing yourself to the present, grounding yourself to this present moment. Being mindful of what is in front of you, you know, where you presently are is important. We can't control things that have happened in the past, and we can't control things that will happen in the future.

However, bringing yourself to the present moment can keep yourself into a routine and decrease the amount of anxiety that could cause negative effects in the future.

Host: You know, one of the questions I had on my list for you is, well, what do we do if we're in the mall and we feel overwhelmed and stressed, or if we're in the middle of a heated conversation with a family member, what are some of those tricks that we should be able to do to kind of bring us back down to being present and less stressed?

It sounds like just breathing and, and doing the things you just discussed could help?

Ashley Soulard, APRN: Yeah, and those can help, but it's really just figuring out what works for you. Is practicing the mindfulness of the 3-3-3 rule? Is it the 10 deep breaths? What really brings you to collect yourself back to the present moment to open up your mind and not let too many outside triggers or effects make rational decisions for you.

So whether you're in the mall or you're in a family's home or in your own home, family houses, for example, just excuse yourself to the restroom, or excuse yourself to grab a drink of water. You know, anybody could get a tickle in their throat where they need to walk away from a situation where it's a polite way to excuse yourself.

And, you know, if it's not a conversation that needs to take effect, then that's okay. Again, just bringing yourself back to the present moment, removing yourself from that situation. It can be the same thing in a mall, busy parking lots, traffic. Really just removing yourself from those outside triggers and being able to recognize them as triggers is important.

And then just circling back, taking that 10 deep breaths, or mindful meditation of the 3-3-3 rule just to recollect, bring you back to presence, and then take on the day.

Host: You know, in some cases, the stress begins with us when we give ourselves unrealistic deadlines or we have some unrealistic expectations. Can you help us set some boundaries for ourselves and talk about some ways that we can prioritize self-care?

Ashley Soulard, APRN: Absolutely. I mean, like I said, routine, routine, routine is important. This isn't something that we want to just practice on Christmas Day or, just practice on the New Year. I mean, this is something that we want to get into routine so that it helps us stay mindful so that when these triggers come up, we're able to recognize the emotions.

We recognize I'm getting a little frustrated with this conversation or I'm feeling a little stressed about needing to plan this party. Planning is important, but taking, you know, that extra 5, 10 minutes where writing things down is important. What you need to do for the holidays, what you have to have for the party, things like that.

And then, it's always okay to ask for help. That's part of being who you are, is recognizing what these triggers are, reaching out to family members or your kids. Sometimes it's fun for them to decorate certain things in the house that typically you would do. And maybe it's not to your personal liking, but it does take it off your list.

So writing things down, planning them out, and just taking a step back so that you're not just driven into the stress. You recognize what could be happening, what needs to be done, and you may find that some of those things on your list aren't completely necessary.

Sometimes, though, you need to be more mindful about is having the people that are around us. So the people that we have today might not be the people that we had, last year. It may not be the same people that are going to be around us next year. So what's really important is being present with everybody.

That is the most important to not only you, but could be a lot more important to your family members and friends as well. So, taking that moment, just be present in the moment and not overfixate on the things that should or could be done.

Host: Yeah. And I imagine for some, the holidays are especially rough if they've lost a loved one. So, it feels like asking for help and sharing that with others could help them through that moment too. What does the science say about diet, about sleep, about exercise and how that can help manage our stress?

Ashley Soulard, APRN: So, again, it all falls into our routine. Exercise, you know, that actually brings up natural endorphins, that make us feel happy. So just getting into a regular routine. There are, like I said, there's 10 minutes a day where you could do chair yoga, regular stretches. That's not only going to help you bring back to mindfulness to start your day, but also increase the endorphins for you to continue throughout your day.

And when you have this, you take that extra 10 minutes to do these things in a routine; it will help de stress or keep things on a lower level as we flow through the holidays and to continue throughout after.

Host: Well, I'm feeling better already, Ashley. Thank you so much for this great conversation, and I hope our listeners feel better prepared to enjoy the holidays stress-free. That was Ashley Soulard, Primary Care Provider at St. Joseph Hospital. If you found this podcast helpful, please share it on your social media channels and be sure to check out our entire podcast library for topics that interest you.

I'm Venita Curry, and this has been Wellness First by St. Joseph Hospital. Thanks so much for joining us and happy holidays.