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New Perspective on Senior Living Myth vs. Reality: What are Senior Living Communities really like? Senior Living Myths Debunked

What exactly comes into your mind when you hear about Senior Living communities?  Most think old age home for senior citizens.  Or a nursing home for those who can't do anything on their own.  We're here to tell you that's not entirely true and set the record straight on the so called "myths" of Senior Living.
New Perspective on Senior Living Myth vs. Reality: What are Senior Living Communities really like? Senior Living Myths Debunked
Featuring:
Mandi Haslett, RN | Courtney Haney
Mandi is a Registered Nurse with 20 years of experience in Healthcare.  She has worked as a patient & family advocate and spent many years as a critical care nurse.  As a nurse leader she has had experience in pulmonary, orthopedics, neuroscience and cardiac care.  Mandi has recently transferred from St. Mary's Hospital to Highland Hills Village and enjoys working closely with residents.  She is a resource and advocate for their well-being & safety. 

Courtney Haney is Director of Ancillary and Support Services at St. Mary's Highland Hills.  Village.
Transcription:

Prakash Chandran (Host): This is Mission In Action, a podcast from St. Mary's Healthcare in Athens, Georgia, focusing on patient-centered care under our mission to be a transforming healing presence within our communities. My name is Prakash Chandran. Today, we'll be talking about senior living communities, myths versus reality. And joining us today are two experts.

The first is Courtney Haney, Director of Ancillary and Support Services at St. Mary's Highland Hills Village, and Mandi Haslett, Director of Nursing at St. Mary's Highland Hills Village. So Courtney and Mandi, so great to have you both on today. Mandi, I'd love to start with you. What exactly is the difference between your community and a skilled nursing facility?

Mandi Haslett, RN (Guest): Well, a skilled nursing is a medical setting, whereas assisted living is in a residential setting. Assisted living is for seniors who don't require constant care, but need assistance with activities of daily living, such as assistance with eating, bathing, dressing, or medication management.

Host: And Courtney, I just wanted to ask, I suppose a more broad question, when we talk about retirement communities, what exactly are those?

Courtney Haney (Guest): So for retirement communities, we refer to them in our industry at senior living. For instance, Highland Hills, we have independent living, assisted living and memory care. And as Mandi had touched on between the skilled and assisted living or retirement, we say residential, but what we really focus on is that home-like atmosphere where somebody can move from a home that they've maybe lived in for 35 plus years with their spouse, into more of an apartment type setting, but with a lot of amenities, with a peer group, social engagement opportunities. And so it really is that residential setting to allow for that home-like atmosphere.

Host: And maybe, can you talk a little bit about who your community supports.

Courtney: Yes really, we meet each resident where they are, because we have both our independent living, our assisted living or our memory care, it's really meeting each resident exactly where they are, with their ability, mentation, physical condition and working with not only the resident, but their family to find the best place for them.

Host: Okay, that makes a lot of sense. And is there Mandi, a particular demographic of people that you work with? You know, just talking about senior living, does that start at a certain age or do people have to have certain conditions to live there?

Mandi: I would let Courtney answer that question. Right?

Courtney: So, what we have is an independent living. Usually what you see in these types of communities, it's for an age demographic of 55 and up. Your assisted living, your memory care, that gets a little different through state regulations, a resident to reside here has to be at least 18 years of age. Of course we don't usually see that demographic, but we're working with residents with an average age at Highland Hills of about 80 to 85 and as Mandi had touched on, we're meeting the resident where they're at. So regardless of age, every resident is in a different part of their aging progression. So it's about making sure that we're being accommodating to their activities of daily living. But usually again, that median age is going to be between 80 and 85.

Host: Okay, that makes a lot of sense. One of the things that we wanted to discuss today are just common myths that you hear out there in the world and on the internet. So, Courtney, maybe I'll start with you. One of the ones that I'd heard about is that, you know, senior living communities just feel like an institution. And I know that even for my parents, they feel like, hey, you know, what, if I go to one of these communities, I'll feel institutionalized. What might you say to people that think that way?

Courtney: We hear that question quite a lot. What separates you from others? Or is it going to be like living in a nursing home? And as we talked about the residential setting, the home life atmosphere, it's really about the way the community is designed. We don't want it to feel sterile. We don't want it to be these white walls and just lacking some type of identity. So it is a home-like atmosphere, simple as residents decorate their own apartment. Residents have their own private spaces. They're not shared apartments. We don't do semi-private options where you would have a roommate.

So everybody has their own private space. They have their own aesthetic that they can bring into their home, outside their doors. We have large gathering spaces with fireplaces and library books and pianos. So residents have areas to congregate in that are warm, they're well decorated, and again, it just presents a comfortable environment.

We don't have IV holes and hospital beds being pushed through hallways. And a lot of times people expect to see something along those lines, like being in a nursing home or visiting a hospital that it's just like going to somebody's apartment or somebody's home. It just happens to be with 75 other senior living residents.

Host: Yeah. I mean, from my perspective, that actually sounds like a good thing to be surrounded by a lot of people that are in the same place in life, they can understand you and you can kind of really form a bond with right. I'm reminded of college days, of being in the dorms, it was just a lot of fun. So, I guess this kind of dovetails or is related to the next question I wanted to ask with having so many people around it, maybe things so structured, some people might worry that they're losing their sense of independence. So Mandi, is this something that you can address?

Mandi: Absolutely. Actually, we have a very energetic community. They come, they go, they go visit friends, they go visit family. They just tell us when they're going to be back. So we kind of have an idea and we're not worried about them. They have parties, they have cocktail hours. They drive their own cars. They also have opportunities for transportation here, wherever they need to go. And however they want to live their life, whether it's very involved or whether they actually are more of a homebody and like to be in their apartment, we're here to meet them where they're at.

Host: And I actually just wanted to expand on something that you just said about transportation, being mobile and being able to go places is such a big part of what makes a person feel independent. That's why I think there's a fear of losing your car or your ability to get around when you go to a place like this. So Courtney, is this something that you can speak to just how transportation works at the senior community like this one?

Courtney: Absolutely. While, I can't speak for others, I can speak for Highland Hills and what we've done to counteract the importance of maybe having to give up the vehicle is we do transportation Monday through Friday. We do it at no cost and the goal there is again, to let residents know a vehicle does not make you independent. I would love for somebody to take me, pick me up, drop me off. I don't have to get out in bad weather, but we do that for our residents and it's not for doctor's appointments, which of course are a priority, but we want our residents to have that freedom of mobility to come and go as they please, meet friends for lunch off site, go to a support group, go shopping.

So we try to make it very simple. And we just ask for 24 hours advance notice, we leave 30 minutes before the resident's appointment time and we have a calling card. So, you tell us when you're ready to be picked up. That way, your day is still yours and you're still as flexible in your schedule as you need to be but without having to worry about the upkeep of a car, gas, insurance, it's really about just making it easier for the resident on a regular daily basis.

Host: But staying with that topic just for a minute, you know, a car, at least I know that for my parents, it's such a symbol of independence. And so, it's wonderful to hear all of the transportation services that you offer there, but are there situations where people can also drive themselves around?

Courtney: Absolutely. So we have plenty of parking for all of our residents. We have resident only reserved spots. That way they're close to all of our entrances for residents to come and go. So even if residents infrequently will drive their vehicle maybe once a week or once a month. We still have parking. So, it's there and it's accessible, but by no means, does it take away the option of using our transportation services. Again, our goal is to just be there for the resident at whatever point in time they need us. We're not going to impose our will on each resident, but it's about being flexible to their schedule, to their needs, whether they have a vehicle here or not. But of course they are welcome.

Host: Now, Mandi, I want to ask you about the concern that is paramount for my mother-in-law. We were actually just talking about this the other day, and that is the worry that the meals are plain, bland and unappetizing at these senior living communities. Is that something that you can speak to?

Mandi: I can. Although there are plenty of options, we have a different calendar every month and their options, they choose within the menu, we also have alternative menues as well. And I will say that is very important to our residents, about their food choices. And we have a lot of other fun things that they get to do as well. We have our chef's cooking channel where, it's not really on a channel, it's in our dining room and our chef comes out and actually prepares, I've seen her do Mexican meals. I've seen her do some Asian meals. I've seen her do some beautiful cakes and the residents sit there and they get to learn and watch.

And of course enjoy the food afterwards. We have lunch crafters, that's going on today. I think it was a shrimp salad today that looked wonderful along with a craft afterwards, that there are so many choices. We try to keep it very different. One month doesn't look like the next month.

That's just really important. We try new things and it is sometimes hard to please, as far as some like their vegetables more soft and some like them more crunchy. So we try to find an in between. But you would be so surprised how our chef knows each individual resident. And if our chef knows that one of our residents doesn't like cheese. They aren't served cheese. If one of them only eats chicken and not pork, then we absolutely, work around any kind of allergy or sensitivity or preference with our food.

Host: Yeah, it's amazing to hear about that level of care and personalization when it comes to the meals. Another question that I wanted to ask was around hobbies. Courtney, I think that there is a concern that people that have established hobbies in their independent living might lose that ability when they come to a senior living community. So is this something that you can speak to?

Courtney: One of the biggest selling points of our community of course, is the safety and security that we provide. But we always want to bring up what is almost just as important, which is engagement in hobbies and activities. Because that's what creates the community. That's what's going to create the connections and the relationships with other residents and with staff. And at the end of the day, that's what makes this community, your new home. So new residents bring new ideas and it's about us as staff getting to know our residents on an individual basis and what their passions are. We don't want the day to be filled with just, everybody thinks in a senior living community, you play bingo every day, while we do have bingo, we have a lot of different things that we do, and it's based on our residents' interests and hobbies. We want every day and every activity that we do to have some type of meaning and some type of purpose. It's not about just keeping people busy, but keeping them engaged. And Mandi touched a little bit about it.

We do activities around food. You know, we have the chefs cooking channel, we have lunch crafters, but then we also have a plethora of other activities. We have a chaplain on staff, which is unique for our community. Chaplain is here three days a week with his church services and Bible studies. We have a personal trainer for exercise classes.

We have book clubs and bridge groups and bunko nights and happy hours. Different games that we play, current event groups, a lot of residents enjoy music. So, we have the bands that come out. We have a harpist that comes out. We have piano recitals and musical groups. We could go on and on, but again, it's going to change based on the month, based on the week.

And it's going to be based around the residents that we currently serve and what are their passions in life and how can we preserve those. And we may have to alter some of them because maybe we're not physically able to do some of the things we used to do, but it doesn't mean that we can't be creative and making sure that we still reach out to each resident and they have their own personal activity or group that they know they'll come to, to be engaged with the community as a whole.

Host: Yeah, there are just so many events going on. It almost sounds like an all-inclusive vacation there. Mandi, one of the questions that I wanted to ask you is just about seeing people outside of the senior community. So, there are going to be people that already have these established routines, maybe meeting up with a friend for coffee or they're seeing their family on a weekly basis. I think there might be concern that they are going to lose some of that freedom of seeing their friends on the outside, and keeping up with them on that consistent basis. So is that something that you can speak to?

Mandi: Just because a resident chooses to come and live in our community doesn't mean that they give up their other friends or their family. We have a lady, she's 95 years old and her family on Sunday night, eats at a certain restaurant. And she goes there and she has fun and she dances and she actually just had a recent birthday party where that band came to her birthday party. We had the best time. We all become friends and very close, but we really encourage our residents to go and to enjoy and to have lunches. And, we've had to really think about, especially during the pandemic and during COVID, how do we have guests here? We've added tables outside, so we can continue having lunches.

So if people want to have someone come here and visit them for lunch that's great. We also have a guest apartment. So that if some friends need to come from out of town that they can stay here on campus as well. So, I really encourage, the residents to keep their relationships as well as make new ones here.

Host: And Courtney, I wanted to move on. You know, one of the things that was touched on earlier is that you could live life however you wanted to, within one of these senior living communities. However, there are going to be people that might feel a little bit more introverted. They might be concerned that they're not going to have as much privacy. How might you address people that have those concerns?

Courtney: Well, it's really about just making the resident as comfortable as possible. So whether you're introverted, extroverted, it's about you living your life, how you see fit. However, we as a community, making sure that you stay safe and that you have all of your needs me. One of the things that we do, and this is a big peace of mind, I guess, is the best way to say it. We do in our independent living, we do wellbeing checks and that's specifically there for residents who maybe we don't see as much, maybe they are a little bit more reclusive and they like their privacy. We do give our residents a wireless emergency pendant. We are staffed around the clock. So if at any point there's an emergency, they can press a button and we can be there to assist.

But for those residents who we don't get to see as much, we do the wellbeing checks in the morning and the evening. It's as simple as pressing a button. And then we do meal service at night and allows us to at least have those engagement opportunities with residents who are more private, and being able to respect their wishes, but also maintain your safety, and their dignity.

That's a big selling point for us and with assisted living and memory care, that's where our 24 hour staff is located the majority of the time, if they're not answering the page. But the same respect is given there for residents who feel more comfortable with privacy. It's absolutely there for them. But we're still going to be diligent in making sure that our residents are safe yet respecting their needs and their desires.

Host: And Mandi, you know, just as we start to close, one of the things that I wanted to ask about was just like the notion that purpose is lost as one gets older, or they become less productive. Mandi, in your experience, do you find that people that move to the senior living community are less productive?

Mandi: I'm going to be very honest. These people, these residents, they run circles around me. They are very busy. Most of these seniors, these residents here, they have been retired for many years already. And they've already found their places as far as whether that's volunteering. We have so many residents that volunteer off of our campus, whether it be in libraries or through churches or local hospitals, but some actually volunteer even here as well in our memory care, in our assisted living areas. Whether they're playing piano or working with word games or helping us with any number of activities. So volunteer is kind of a big opportunity. But I'm going to tell you these people, they go, go, go. I see people leaving in the mornings to go swim at the Y. I see them, they have very competitive bridge groups, whether they're playing here on campus or they go somewhere else to play bridge. They are busy. And that's why we have a busy, activity schedule as well, whether we're going out to Sandy Creek for the planetarium. I think all of our men are gone today to have lunch off campus with our chaplain. They are busy. So the idea of not knowing what to do or having something to do, it really doesn't exist here unless you want it to. And we do some visits just to check on our residents from time to time to see what kind of, what they're doing in their own apartment and they share their crafts, their hobbies. They share many books with me that they love me to read at home.

And so, really, it's just like a group of friends and we're all here together. And really, as Courtney said a while ago, we're just helping each person live the life that they want to. And just being with them and meeting with them where they are at.

Host: So Courtney, do you have any final thoughts around productivity or around purpose or just the general conversation that we've had here today?

Courtney: I think the end goal is, is really just knowing what our communities are about. And for a lack of a better term, I hear people say, well, will I be held hostage again? Again, we're here to make you happy. Keep you safe, give you the best quality of life that you can, and whether it's an independent living or assisted or memory, it's about the progression of care that we provide and meeting the resident where they are, where their needs are, and making sure that if this is where you want to be, that we maintain this as your home through the very end and aging in place is extremely important to us just as it is to our residents.

But as Mandi said, I think just a little bit ago, you know, we're one big family, we're one big group. We might not be blood relatives, but we're all invested in each other's lives, residents and staff. And it's a unique setting that you can come and be a part of and it's one that I hope more people study up on just to make sure that they know the differences and what a great place a senior living community can be for anybody that is going through the aging process.

Host: Yeah. And if I could just end with a personal anecdote, both my grandmother and my wife's grandmother, they were really apprehensive about going to a senior community. And, for my grandmother, she had some of the best years and most productive years of her life at her senior community before she passed.

And, my wife's grandmother, who's still alive, is so happy and thriving over there that we can't even book time to see her because of all of the things that she has going on and all of the friends that she's made. So, Mandi, I imagine something that you see is that there's a lot of apprehension, a lot of fear around everything that we've talked about today, but once they get there, it's like a switch that there's this thriving and it's never as bad as they think and in fact, it's probably some of the best years of their life. Is that something that you're seeing?

Mandi: It is. It's a great opportunity to watch people come in and watch their transition. Andalso my office is right near the front door. And the most beautiful thing is whenever someone comes back from visiting their family or having lunch with their friends, our staff call-out, welcome home. In fact, this morning, they said that to me, when I walked in the door, welcome home and we feel that way. And, we hope everybody will come and take a look at our community and as Courtney said, learn a lot more about senior living.

Host: And Courtney I'll just give you the last word in case there's any final closing thoughts you want to share.

Courtney: Just to piggyback off what Mandi said, I heard, the welcome home today too. And we can sit here and use words like assisted living and senior living and retirement, but it is, it's home. And it's your home, how you make it, how you live it, how you want it to be, and it's a great place to work. It's a great place to live. And every day we try to get better at what we do. So that way our residents have better tomorrows than they did yesterdays.

Host: Well, Courtney and Mandi, this has been a wonderful conversation. Thank you both so much for your time today.

Courtney: Thank you.

Mandi: Thank you.

Host: That's Courtney Haney, Director of Ancillary and Support Services at St. Mary's Highland Hills Village and Mandi Haslett, Director of Nursing at St. Mary's Highland Hills Village. For more information, you can call 706-353-8840. Or check out our website at St.Mary'shealthcaresystem.org. You can select to find a service or specialty at the top of the page under popular services and specialties and select Highland Hills Village.

If you found this podcast to be helpful, please rate and share it on your social channels and be sure to check out the entire podcast library for topics of interest to you. This has been Mission In Action, a podcast from St. Mary's Healthcare in Athens, Georgia, focusing on how we provide patient-centered care under our mission to be a transforming healing presence within our communities. Once again, my name is Prakash Chandran. Thank you so much for listening and we'll talk next time.