When you reach the 18-24 month range (the start of the "terrible twos"), your previously blank-slate existence starts to be written upon. At this age, you're no longer the center of the world. Behaviors are now either rewarded or punished. If you walk, you get love. If you talk, you get love. If you eat your vegetables you get love.
This is the time your inner child becomes programmed.
We all have an inner child within us... it's how you respond to the needs and desires of your inner child that may determine success in relationships; whether friendships or romantic partnerships.
For example, if you are a woman who was the product of divorce, you may constantly try to be "enough" in your relationships, especially if you only saw your father on the weekends. Your child self may have thought, "If I just get good grades, was prettier or thinner... if only I could made him happier when he's here, he'll want to spend more time with me."
Now, you may play out that same drama with the men you become involved with, usually without even realizing it.
How can you control the influence of your inner child?
The biggest step is to recognize what is happening when you turn to your inner child. You're making choices from a victim's mentality. Instead, act as the adult who can soothe that child. Tell yourself, "You're screaming for attention from your partner, when it should be directed it at yourself." Parent yourself. When you get into an emotional tizzy, you've given your adult power away and the child has taken over.
You also need to make yourself a priority. Allow for your own space and goals. Life isn't a romance novel. Give to yourself what you want from another. If you can't give it to yourself, give it to someone other than your partner, even if that other entity is an animal/pet.
Ultimately, self-love is the answer.
Listen in as Intuitive Life Coach, Morgan McKean, joins host Lisa Davis to share how you can calm your inner child and create healthier relationships with others and yourself.
Ultimately, self-love is the answer.
Listen in as Intuitive Life Coach, Morgan McKean, joins host Lisa Davis to share how you can calm your inner child and create healthier relationships with others and yourself.